“The secret of change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” ~Socrates~
Today’s focus is on revisiting some old sayings, quotes and proverbs and adapting them to become more aligned with this new value-based, empathy-driven economy. I think that perhaps sometimes we are so set in a particular model of the world that it holds us back from enjoying the fullness of life all around us.
I love the idea of periodically ‘checking in’ on our existing value construct and even loosening our Model of the World (MOTW), in order to allow new perspectives and pathways of creative solutions.
Sometimes, we hold beliefs and run unconscious programs that are in conflict with what we wish to manifest in life.
Just because something has always been a particular way does not mean it cannot be looked at differently and given a ‘newer’, more empowering interpretation. So here are my newest ways of looking at the world.
1. Old Economy: “Fake it until you make it.” Which loosely translates to living a life that has little or nothing to do with authenticity, tell ‘made up’ stories (not your true stories), simply to brag, impress and make yourself look ‘bigger.’ The irony is of course that in living and doing business this way, you diminish your true value. This is also one of the main reasons people rack up obscene high-debt levels!
New Economy: “Focus all your energy on making it, so that you never have to fake it!” This suggests that you channel every resource you have towards your goals. Become one with your goals, and take quantum leaps and create value by solving problems, while sharing your truth and telling your unique story and journey! People can sense, small and feel B.S from a mile, so be yourself, period. It’s also way healthier for your life overall. As the saying goes: “When you tell the truth you do not have to remember anything.”
So rather than blindly following the ‘Joneses’, begin to set yourself apart as an original and simply take action towards your purpose. Life is much more fun and less stressful in the ‘REAL’ zone. The ‘FAKE zone, may initially be thrilling, however it ultimately drains, depresses and depletes because the brain simply does not have that strong a firewall to fuel the various incongruent parts! It is healthier to ‘sew your cloth according to your material’ and not according to your size.
2. Old Economy: “Forgive but don’t forget.” In order words, cling on to the myth of your non-existent pain in the present and create a future based on it. Fight the healing power of time and continue to perpetuate your ‘woe me’ story.
New Economy: “Forgive AND Forget.” The whole essence of forgiveness is the willingness, courage and acknowledgement of what has happened, the vulnerability to embrace and feel the pain it caused and yet decide to let it go. Forgiveness is total surrendering and acceptance. You forgive and forget both the pain and its perpetrator, rather, focus on what the experience taught you.
True forgiveness does not hold on to the event, rather it filters only the learnings from the event. It also gifts you with the ability to set firmer and clearer boundaries to others.
So with the passage of time, re-telling the story of your past pain simply becomes content-free (less focused on the drama), and more focused on preserving and sharing the learnings. This is true empowerment.
3. Old Economy: “It is better to teach a man how to fish than to give him fish.” Sometimes, it is important to know the other person’s model of the world and perhaps even enter it in order to gently, yet firmly guide them to navigate their way to a new understanding and hopefully, embrace healthier options and choices.
New Economy: “It is good to give a man fish, it is better to teach him how to fish and it is best to give him some fish while you teach him, lest he quenches before the lessons are finished.” In an empathy-driven economy, we acknowledge that one size never fits all and there’s a need to meet people at their level in order to lift them up to where they really belong or aspire to reach.
4. Old Economy: The law of attraction was based on feeling only ‘positive’ feelings, using your powers of imagination and focus. It was largely based on the notion that ‘You attract whatever you want.’
New Economy: This postulates a revised law of attraction based on feeling ALL your feelings, gaining mastery of your internal representation (state mastery) and the idea that what ever you are, have or do, essentially flows from who you are BEING. Thus, ‘you attract who you are.’
It also focuses a lot on taking congruent and consistent ACTION. The law of Attraction is simply the law of manifestation (of your actions). Thus, the questions you should answer are: ‘Who are you really BEING when you’re DOING what you’re doing? ‘Are you congruent and are your values aligned, in your thoughts, words and action steps, in both your inner and outer lives?’ In the words of Aristotle: We are what we repeatedly do!
4. Old Economy: “When life hands you lemons, you make lemonade.”
New Economy: Here, there’s a need to reflectively think about what you do in the wake of any situation. Is your default reaction to see it through the ‘victim lens’ or do you see life through the ‘opportunity lens?’ In the new economy, everything you encounter and everyone you interact with offer you new learning and an opportunity for collaboration, synergy and growth. You must have a deep awareness of who you are and also have the courage to embrace all of you, both your weaknesses and your strengths!
b) YOU ignore them and waste your time searching for apples, till someday, you get famished and realize the lemons are now rotten and have gone bad. OR
c. YOU get angry and become permanently mad at the world. To express your self-justified anger and self-inflicted pain, you throw the lemons at others.
Or cut them up and squirt the juice into people’s eyes so that they too can experience your pain and desolation. And then you all hang out and swap stories of your pain, while drinking your bitter tequila/gin/lemon filled cup. OR
d) YOU are grateful for your lemons and embrace the challenge and opportunity they hold. And even though you may prefer apples or oranges, you decide to take action, turn them into lemonade and sell it all for profit.
Also, you plant the seeds and grow a lemon orchard. You begin to attract like-minded people who embraced their lemons. And you share ideas and joint-venture with them. Then, with the profits from your deals, you buy apples (your preferred fruit) 🙂 and bigger, riper, sweeter lemons which you sell (and give some away) to those in group (a), (b) and (c)!
In fact, you become so busy creating different opportunities, and consequently, enriching your inner and outer world. Your lemons suddenly become the keys that unlock your life’s purpose! It all starts with a simple step.
Everything you have in your life right NOW, whether good or ‘bad’, are your life lemons. the choice of what to do with them is yours.
You have the unique talents and skills to co-create your reality and design your destiny. Are you ready to take a chance and bet on YOU? Are you ready to get out of your own damn way? 🙂
The questions then become: Will you continue to sit on the toxic fence and continue telling ‘woe me’ stories of blaming, complaining, condemning and justifying why life handed you ‘bad’ lemons OR will today be the day you decide to take ACTION in the direction of your dreams and goals?
Are you ready to hear, see and live your truth by telling ‘wow me’ stories of yourself, taking control of your destiny and owning up to the responsibility and consequences for your actions and results?
Your goals are your sacred contracts you hold with yourself. If you are not willing to honour your commitment to yourself, it is near impossible to honour your commitment to others. Conversely, the universe returns to you exactly what you put out.
Say your goals exactly how you want them and take congruent actions to fulfil them. BE who you want to become. You can attract only what and who you are. Dream wonderful dreams and co-create your destiny with God!
Join the conversation on our Facebook page: www.facebook.com/wholewomannetwork
Make it a fabulous day!
-Juliet ‘Kego Ume-Onyido, MBA
Poet | Master-Certified Leadership Coach-Trainer -Consultant|
~Take empowered ACTION towards a Healthier, Sexier, Wealthier YOU!~
The preceding is a guest post from Juliet Ume, MBA –Co-Founder and Executive Director at Whole Woman Network. Juliet is the author of the upcoming books: “UN-Locking Your HeArt of Leadership” and “Today, I Will Not Bow”. A self-described Life-Connoisseur, who loves life and the whole human experience, Juliet was nicknamed a ‘reminderist’, [one who reminds us of that which we already know; that we are not fractured or broken and NOW is the perfect time to replace that fallacy with a new, beautiful truth: we are worthy, empowered, complete, whole creatures and our life journey is to return to wholeness]!
She is a passionate advocate of WomEntrepreneurship, Leadership, Investment & Financial Literacy for women and youth (especially girls). Her mission is simply to engage, educate and empower women, regardless of their levels of income or background, to return to ‘wholeness’ and live Healthier, Sexier, Wealthier Lives using Faith-based, Scientific and Universal (Common-Sense) principles! Follow her on Twitter: @wholewomaninc, @julietumeinc. Enjoy some of her portfolio of poems on her Floetry Blog and follow her daily reflective posts on Facebook.
Her message is simply: “To use the power of written-spoken-sung WORDS to connect, heal, empower, change and transform our inner and outer worlds. Words have power in the meaning and interpretation we choose to give them and all of life is synchronistic poetry in motion! Are you telling empowering stories about yourself and others?”
- 209. Law of Attraction Tips That Are Working For Me (toinspirefromwithin.com)
- The Law Of Attraction (1bestofwayss.wordpress.com)
- Attract Abundance in This Economy! (youuniversityonline.com)